Saturday, September 5, 2009

Smoking, and boredom.

From the "bad-habits" dept.

Kinda-sorta trying to quit smoking. Have cut back quite a bit (1/2 to 3/4 of a pack/day), but not nearly enough. Thinking about investing in 'the gum' this week rather than a carton.

Smoking at work will be the hardest thing to cut out. Sitting at a desk for 8 hours is almost painful. At least when I worked at the video store I had something to DO every minute of the day. Helping customers, stocking shelves etc. I wasn't just sitting and staring at a monitor the whole time. I imagine that I could just wander around the parking lot for a few minutes every hour instead of lighting up. This is because I'm not so sure its a nicotine craving, but the need to get up and stretch, move around a bit.

Which is another problem. I tend to smoke more when I'm bored. The other night I was tearing down and putting together a couple of computers (using my new CyberTool 41 SAK - Happy Birthday to me!), and didn't feel the need to smoke for several hours at a time. But then last night, I was installing Ubuntu and some other software (on the same machines), I was just bored during the install process and ended up smoking half a pack in 5 or 6 hours. Not trying to make excuses or anything, its just an observation.

The more I think about it though, the more I DON'T want to smoke. At least in the long term. When I imagine myself as a nerdcore, diaper-messenger bag carrying, video-shooting, picture-taking, middle-earth-story-telling, GEEK DAD, I do NOT see myself smoking. I tried to imagine it this morning on the way into work, and the image just did not fit.

Its like those times I've taken my son out to events with other parents and kids. I feel like the insane oddball of the group when I step aside to fill my lungs with noxious fumes. I don't like smoking around kids. Never have. I always try to hide around a corner or something, but that just makes me more of the misfit. So out of place as a smoker in this world. Everything these days has been altered to a non-smoking environment. Which is not to say that's a bad thing. YES, smoking is bad for you, yes it causes cancer, etc, etc, etc. 

Next week I'm planning on being more pro-active with quitting. Thinking I'll start with the gum, because i LIKE gum. We'll see how it goes.

OK, back to work! these spreadsheets won't create themselves :)

Today's stats so far,

cigarettes smoked this morning: 6

coffee drank: 10 cups (and counting)

miles driven: 22

minutes spent writing this: 75

minutes spent working: 15

minutes spent on gtalk with my sister-in-law: 21

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