Monday, August 30, 2010

From Mas Art

Today's DOTD is an attempt at greater controll over concentric lines (straight) and slightly shifted circles. Sharpie pen, gel pen and a little highlighter on 8/30...

R-W-B 'Splosion (DOTD 8/26/10)

So, at first I thought that maybe this would have been my 'homage to the Union Jack' however, its not even close to the right symmetry. Therefore, its a simple rwb explosion... And thats the DOTD for 8/26, because my phone refused to send the post.




DOTD 08/29/2010

Offset spheres, hash marks,

Self Portrait 8/19/2010

Self Portrait. August 2010

DOTD step 3 (finished!)

DOTD step 2

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Another day another conference call, another calendar doodle...

Sent from my G1, far from home.

Total Perspective Vortex? I don't thinks so. Hey, I'm Zaphod Beeblebrox baby!

Sent from my G1, far from home.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

From Empty Lighter

Todays 'doodle' is kinda lame, but I called it x-mas in August.
My wife says I'm hi-larious!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Doodle of the Day

From Empty Lighter
I know, it's drawn in the wrong day, but I just got this calendar today. Give me a break.

Pen and highlighter on cheap note pad

Sent from my G1, far from home.

From Empty Lighter

Pen and highlighter on desk calendar, oct.2009

Sent from my G1, far from home.

Hold it steady R2!

Sent from my G1, far from home.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Thinking about Irony

There was a link to a Guardian article in my last post, but I wanted to just share my favorite part of that article:

Irony and America
There are a few reasons why we think the Americans have no sense of irony. First, theirs is rather an optimistic culture, full of love of country and dewy-eyed self-belief and all the things that Europe's lost going through the war spindryer for the thousandth time. This is all faith-based - faith in God, faith in the goodness of humanity, etc - and irony can never coexist with faith, since the mere act of questioning causes the faith fairy to disappear. Second, they have a very giving register that, with a sense of irony, would be unsustainable (how can you wish a stranger a nice day with a straight face?). Third, because we think Canadian Alanis Morissette is American, and she proved some time ago, with her song Ironic, that she didn't know what irony meant (this is so ironic - first, because we think we're the more sophisticated and yet don't know the difference between America and Canada, second because America sees Canada as such a tedious sleeping partner, and yet Canada is subversively sending idiots into the global marketplace with American accents. Of course, I'm being ironic. Canadian accents are not the same as American ones!) [Emphasis Mine]

I was thinking about the whole Alanis Morissette thing the other day humming the tune and seriously thinking about the lyrics and realized (for the thousandth time), it's not Irony she is singing about. NOTHING in that song is ironic. Most of it is just coincidental. I tried to tell my wife, and she kept staring at me like I was telling her the most idiotic thing, like they all figured it out LONG ago and I'm just now getting it. **Shakes Head Slowly; sigh**

I know I use ironic and irony wrong all the time, but I don't let it bother me. Mostly because I've tried correcting others on the use of irony, and they slap me down for being too anal about language...


Until this Morning, I Had no Idea That I Liked 'Flight of the Concords'

There is some thing seriously wrong with the Music folder on my G1, and I just haven't had time to fix it. The only things showing up on my play lists are recently added tracks, even though I can see a bunch of older stuff on the SD card. Big deal though, at least it got me from Primary Phase to Quintessential Phase. So, because I didn't feel like listening to the White Stripes again (ironic, I think. But more on that later... ) I decided to test out Pandora on the EDGE. [Yes, T-Mobile still doesn't have 3G out here, one reason we're switching back to F*N Verizon in the spring] I'd installed it a while back and completely forgot it was even there, so all my stations, etc. were already set up for me.

I am pleasantly surprised.

Pandora actually works pretty well. I randomly selected a station as I pulled out of the garage and playback started immediately (Was still connected to my homes WiFi). The one I picked was an oldie [hadn't used Pandora for almost 2 years] "NERDCORE/Misc..." which, from what I can remember, tried to start with either mc chris, or the Front. Can't quite remember, except that whoever it was at the time wasn't listed, so a replacement was used to start it, and I probably added some random stuff at one point to spice it up. In this case, mc chris' Pizza Butt started my commute. Hit Thumbs UP! Next, They Might Be Giants, Istanbul (Not Constantinople). Awesome. One of my all time favorite songs in the known universe.

Then it got better, and weirder.

Up until this morning, I had no idea that I liked Flight of the Concords. Also, there was an MC Lars song that I'd never heard before (ridiculous you say), GirlTalk, and some other stuff I, can't remember. However, the tone of the 'station' changed as I drove. For some reason it started going more and more into mid-90s-Early 2ks style alternative stuff, like Cake (who I love) and other rock songs. Have to dome tweaking with my ups/downs. The Final Irony though, was that it gave me The White Stripes after all, in the form of Seven Nation Army. That bassline just kills me every time.

Overall, good experience. Only issue I really had was going through a 2+ mile stretch where the cell reception always sucks and being cut off in the middle of a good song, then jumped into another song which cut off again into yet a 3rd song... You'd think there would be more buffering for that kind of thing. I did try to 'share' a song to myself when I pulled into the parking lot, but it just crashed the program. Also, the damned thing takes AGES to load up. The splash screen is there for at least 45 seconds, sometimes longer, and you tend to get the feeling that it's taunting you and your patience. (I'm sure that these minor glitches are worked out on the newer phones, with super-awesome 1Ghz+ procs, not to mention a better network!)

I give Pandora on Android a thumbs up.


Monday, August 2, 2010

Oct 31st through Nov 6th, 2009

This is the first post in a series. I've found that my memories are starting to slip a little, and I want to make sure that I always have a record. Right now is probably the best time to do it, as I've noticed that as some memories are fading, others are sharper than they were a couple of months ago. Probably because I've had the time to organize my head, and recap to myself, make sure its in the right order. Not to say that it's complete yet, there will be some pick-up posts I'm sure that will fit into the timeline, but be posted out of order. Whenever possible I will try to provide a link to either my Twitter feed, Face Book status, or a post on


The last thing I remember, Natalie is sitting next to me at VVMC in Cottonwood. I've just been shown an x-ray of my chest (photo-copied for some reason), and there's a fuzzy area that someone tells me is fluid, filling one lung. A doctor comes in and talks about a tube down my throat, a ventilator (for some reason, my memories of this conversation are duplicated 2-3 times, like deja-vu in a prism). I have oxygen already, but they must have put something else in it and i sort of doze off halfway through the doctor's little speech. This is probably the last thing I saw:

From Empty Lighter

For some reason, whenever I'm just waiting some where, I take a picture of my foot.

          6 days earlier, I had gotten really sick. A couple of days before Halloween we sent one of my employees home because she was REALLY sick, and we didn't want to get what she had. I don't really know if that's where I got sick, but it's worth noting.

Halloween night, 2009.
          We went out and trick-or-treated. I think Dylan had a really good time, or at least he was happy that he got a bunch of candy :) Either way, it was a good night.

This is my last 'tweet' before I got sick:

" and no one had any idea who I was!" 


I ended up driving over to my mom's house to help Raph out. He was moving out of his appt, and he put some things in our garage. When I came home, I drank one beer, watched some tv and was asleep by 11:30.

When I woke up Sunday morning, I felt hung over. Dehydrated, as if I'd been out all night partying. I would have just called in sick, but since it was a payroll weekend, I had to go in. People MUST be paid. I worked about 8 hours, got done as much as I possibly could, and went straight home and to bed. Had to work 1/2 day Monday to finalize everything, then went straight back to bed. Natalie was awesome, she went out and bought me some cold medicine and stuff. The Alkaseltzer made me feel a bit better, and I just stayed in bed for the next 2 days. By the 4th of November my fever wasn't any better, in fact it kept going up no matter what we did. So I dragged myself out of bed that night and drove to the ER.

You know, I'd been to hospitals and the ER especially several times (2 just in the previous year), and for some reason I always practice what I'm going to say to the check-in lady, always thinking they will turn me away at the window. I need to justify to myself, why I'm in the ER if I'm not bleeding profusely.

The triage nurse noticed my "Storm Trooper Pirate Flag" shirt and tested me by asking what the Kessel Run was. Luckily, I had just finished reading the Han Solo Trilogy. Any way, triage went alright and I ended up half naked in a large room with glass doors.

They did some tests and nasal swabs, and blood tests. After about an hour they came back and said "Nope, you're fine. Just a mild lung infection." they gave me a prescription for Motrin 80 and sent me home.

Well, I felt a bit better the next day, but still didn't go to work. I think this was Wednesday, but can't remember for sure. I was in bed all week, and it felt like a month. I laid on my stomach and spit our whatever I coughed up, which I didn't realize at the time was blood. After a day or two the Alkaseltzer wasn't working any more, and I could hardly eat, so I drove myself back to the ER at around 10 (I think) on Nov. 6th.

Failing Memory

Trying to figure out if my memory is failing faster than normal. Is my mind the same as it was before November, or did something happen to me? For the most part, I think I'm still the same, or back to about 90% of what I was before.

Part of it is this morning: I was driving in, and I had probably 5 good ideas for a blog post today. By the time I actually got to the office, I couldn't remember one of them. I think one actually had to do with driving.

But, I seriously had whole sentences made out in my head. meh. As much as I loathe the sound of my own voice, maybe a voice recorder would help. Should probably test with my old iRiver, if can find it. you know, before going out and buying a new one.

Beyond this specific circumstance, though, I think that I'm having more memory problems than I had before. I know there is some kind of disconnect between my brain and my mouth.

STFU pt2

No, you're singing over the Beatles isn't annoying... It's FRAKIN' ANNOYING!

please stop :(

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Forced Positive Reinforcement

This is probably the most Frakked up thing I've ever been asked to do for work. Last Friday, on my day off, a memo and email was sent round our department asking (TELLING) us all to write a handwritten note to the Leader Guy of our company. It went something like this [Paraphrasing to Protect The Innocent]:

From: Boss Lady
To: All Managers etc...
RE: A Massive, Overwhelming Amount of Optimistic, Supportive Affirmation
Over the next few days have your staff members write (handwritten) a short note to [Corporate Leader Dude].
This note will thank him for all the great things he has done for the company since [Hostile, but-in-a-good-way, Take Over of Our Company] and then why they like their jobs what their job has done for them personally and professionally.
I don't want them asking for anything just a note of gratitude and an short expression of [Lame Corporate Philosophical BS]!
If they want to compliment you, an admin person, each other, or [Whichever Money-Making Department Who's A$$ We're Kissing This Week], that's good too.
If they have any notes from Clients thanking them for a great job pls include those as well.
Pls have these done by Wednesday and [yadda yadda yadda]
I can only think of 2 reasons why our Boss Lady would demand something so demeaning. 1) The Leader Dude of our company is so insecure and heartrendingly childish that he needs constant reassurance that he is a good person. Or 2) My Boss Lady is seriously trying to kiss ass for some reason.
Either way... UGH. It still makes me feel dirty just thinking abut it. To basically be ordered to write something like this. So, I threw the idea around my head, and decided that I wanted NO part of this. At all. a couple days go by and we get the THIS from my supervisor:
[Boss Lady] told me yesterday that no one is following the guidelines below for their letters.

Please try to do your best and at least show her that Marketing can do what she asks.

And the "Guide Lines," which are basically a bullet list of points we're supposed to make on this 'assignment.'
  • Thanking [Ultra-Supreme-Company-Leader Dude] for being Super Leader Dude.
  • For providing you all with jobs
  • Why YOU like Your job
  • What Your job has done for You
  • Compliment a person in another dept.
  • Attach one note of thanks from a client.
Seriously. So, my own direct supervisor kept after me to do this, and I talked with some other folks who actually did it. Some people went WAY overboard and some people disregarded the guidelines altogether and asked for all kinds of shit. It came down to the deadline (Past it actually) when I decided to go ahead and write something at least. What I came up with was as horrific as it was funny and intelligent (at least I think so, as does my wife). All I needed was a starting place, which I couldn't find until supervisor lady just said: introduce yourself. So, here it is in it's entirety. the Yellow highlighted parts are what ended up in the final draft, handwritten on 2 sheets of copy paper. The gray parts are all the other junk I jotted down, which was then distilled for its essence and spit out as the yellow stuff. the cross-outs are parts that shouldn't have even been written, or just errors in both accuracy and judgment.

So here it is, the worst sellout in my life so far:
Dear Mr. [Name of CEO Type Dude],
My name is [Name of Depraved Employee] and I am the [Extraordinarily long job title] at the [less than vague location]. I’ve held this position for the last [Relatively Long Time]. Prior to this I was the [Previous Position(s) held] for the [Location] Region. I’ve been with the company for a total of [Excessively LONG period of Time].
We are all doing fine, except for the scurvy. Who, as you know is quite the Rapacious Villain!! Lol, not unlike the vehemently acquisitive and avaricious company we all work for, right? Am I right? Yeah, you know it… Much like the Mandelorian Armor of Boba (and his ‘father’ Jango) Fett, you cradle and protect each one of us, and fend off invaders with your flame thrower….
First, I’d like to personally thank you for the stirring and inspirational leadership that has come to us these last few years. I’ve seen this company go through many changes over the years, and can honestly say that the last few years have definitely been the best. It is truly great to see executives that care about not only the Owners and Guests, but the employees as well. In particular the Employee Recognition Program looks nice, and I can’t wait to see some of the collateral and use it in our office.
I’ve seen this company go through many changes, and can honestly say that the last few years have definitely been the best. Both As an employee and a fan of TIMESHARE (sic) I mean, Vacation Ownership and a human being,  of this company, I have a job that …
Something. Fraking formatting screw up threw me off. Goddamnit.
It’s been requested of me to divulge the following: Your awesome leadership through these dark and mortally terrifying times has been quite tenacious! You have pulled us through the black depths of the ‘recession’ to a bright gleaming future. A future lighted with rainbows and unicorns.
 I also wanted to mention that I think it was great the way the company handled the recession which started 2 years ago. Of course, I was not worried about our company. From the first signs of looming depression I had no doubt that we would pull through it together. And here we are, still going strong! Thank you for that, sir.
I’ve also been ordered to tell you how insanely grateful I am that you are the Leader of this Great Company, and that it, in fact, exists at all. Because, obviously, I would not be able to feed my family if it wasn’t for you. Yes, without first a) the concept of timeshare [sic] I mean Vacation OwnershipJ, and then b) you, my Lord and Master. No matter that Fear no longer guides me, and I’m sure that if this company did not exist I would not have a problem with selling my everlasting soul (what’s left of it after the gang rape of timeshare) to another systematic plague ridden ass factory.
            The best thing about a job like this, in a place like this, in this industry, is the people I get to work with. Always professional, competent and just plain good people. Obviously, working with [Name Of My PHB] is a pleasure and a blessing. She is more like a mentor to me than a boss. But others in our organization, out side the specific scope of Marketing have been influential and helpful. Such as [Misc Emploee #1] in accounting, and [Misc. Employee #2] at Corporate Payroll. These are folks who will do their best day in and day out and help out a fellow co-worker in any way they can.
Frankly, if it weren’t for  in spite of the people I work with, I would have gone crazy a long [Fraking] time ago!
The best thing I like about my job is going home to my family each night; knowing that I have left behind me a job well done; and cannibalizing my own clockwork orange. Or at the very least another dead tree.  It also amuses me the way that Corporate Announcements FAIL SUCCEED on every level. What is the [Lame Corporate Philosophical BS]? I have no idea. It seems like a redundant and Machiavellian treatise on the Art of War. What I like best, I suppose, is the incredible opportunity to offer the tenants of [Different Lame Corporate Motto] (©®™ǽ₤№ª¤) to an amazing number of people, whom I will never see.
Again, I cannot be more explicit with why I love my job. This position has treated me very well. Without this job, I would be lost. Both morally and financially. This job has changed me on so many levels; it’s difficult to know where to start. Suffice to say that I would not be in this position if it weren’t in fact, FOR this position!! Lol
In closing, I just want to reiterate that without this job, the position I am in within this company, I would not be the person I am today. Thank you, thank you very much.

God, I need a shower after just reading it...
A myth is a religion in which no one any longer believes.
  - James Feibleman